Rest In Peace Papa

First off, I want to thank everyone that has said prayers, sent kind words and thoughts... and basically just been there for my family and I thru this extremely tough time. We couldn't of done it without you all. Everything still is very surreal and will only get harder the more reality sets in but we have several loved ones around us and are very grateful for you all in our lives. 

Second, I want to explain a little bit what happened so that all the loose questions to what exactly happened are answered. I have not been able to post much about the whole saga because I have been at a loss for words...I want you all to know that Papa was more than a grandfather to me...he was a best friend, a fatherly "male" figure in my life, he was someone I could talk to about anything.. my wild dreams and big goals and he would 150% support me. He believed in everything I did and still do. He always wanted the best for me and was always pushing me farther than I myself thought I could go. I loved that about him. He taught me to cook, bake, how to play bocci, taught me as well as many of our family members all about our ancestry when he tracked everyone down and was able to get into contact with many distant relatives. He always was one of the first people to comment on any blog posting or anything that I would ever write always pushing me and telling me that writing is what I need to pursue because he can tell I am passionate about it.  Those were just a few among MANY things I've learned from him. Papa's baking and cooking was something to be talked about...it was ALWAYS good even when he was "just trying" something new it always tasted good. Many of my friends and family LOVED coming over when he would make desserts because they were unlike any they had ever had. He was very talented in the kitchen and loved baking and cooking. 
Him and my nanny would travel the world together and come back with amazing stories and spectacular photos. Something I always looked forward to seeing and hearing all about. Papa was an extremely wise man and lived a long and wonderful life.  He taught us all many things and although we are sad that he is gone and no longer "physically" present in our daily lives we know he is with us in spirit. We have all the wonderful memories in which he left for us and know that he is just another guardian angel of ours watching over the rest of the family.
Although towards the end it was rougher and quicker than expected he did not have to suffer as extreme of pain as he would have had to if he were to have lived and fought the cancer.

Here's what my family has been going thru and what we all went thru....

July 18th, Papa was diagnosed with stage 4 Lung cancer after almost a year of every kind of test you could imagine. By this time the symptoms that he was experiencing were : loss of blood count "somewhere" and extreme difficulty eating. More scopes and tests were need and several trips and check ins to hospita

ls local and at Rush in Chicago. During this time he had also lost 30 lbs., his health and nutrition level were NOT what they needed to be to begin treatment. The local GI doctor was not able to get a scope down his esophagus as previously performed back in September of 2011...some doctors felt we were dealing with two types of cancer lung and esophageal, which determined the type of Chemo he was going to receive.
August 9 he was admitted to Rush for a esophageal stretching and to possibly have a G-tube, feeding tube inserted into his stomach...that was done. He ended up with a foli catheter as a going home present. A week went by with follow-up and finally the day arrive we would begin to fight and attack the cancer that was inside his body and media nodes. 

August 20th was the first Chemo treatment, that morning my mom got a call from nanny saying "Papa had a rough weekend, and wasn't feeling to well" but the oncologist said come in and we will access the situation. Complaining of stomach pains, looking at G-tube site they felt he was still healing in that area and that the pain was probably from the cancer that was now beginning to attack his other organs and lymph nodes..they proceeded with treatment.
My mom took them back home, waited and the pain was getting worse, about 5:30 my mom said we need to call 911...I am NOT walking in on foot and he was extremely dehydrated. My moms thinking his kidneys were not working well.
Papa arrived, and my mom and nanny shortly after...the ER was began...2 hours before anything was done and a doctor came to see them. Pacing the nurses station my mom and nanny finally got them to start ordering some tests.. The first was a chest xray...hmmm the doctor says...you have a puncture in your stomach somewhere...there is air where it is not suppose to be...all hell broke lose and the doctors went into panic mode....a few more tests and several hours later it was determined that it was not the esophagus tear but the feeding tube had become dislodged in his stomach.
The surgeon came in a performed emergency exploratory surgery at 2:45 am...they waited. Feeling Papa was not going to make it off the table...at 5:00 am he came out to tell us that he made it through but he was a VERY sick man, probably the sickness in the hospital and IF he makes it through this, he may not be able to even fight the cancer. The next 12 hours will determine that. The G-tube had come lose and he had a hole in his stomach that was the size of a half dollar...pouring out into his belly were fluids, waste, bacterias, and MAJOR infection.
Mom and Nanny went home at 6:15 am to try to get some rest...headed back to the hospital not sure what we would find and hear. Things didn't look good, Papa was not really responding to the meds and his blood pressure was very low. Family started to come in...my aunt jean spent the morning trying to get on stand-by flights from California, arriving at 5:30 to Condell Hospital, we needed to make a family decision...the ventilator was removed and meds were reduced and at 6:55 pm he went home with family surrounding him.
We cried, we laughed, we gave Papa a hard time for leaving us to do the cooking and make the cannolis...
WE are glad that he did not have to plow the Chemo road and go through all the treatments BUT extremely sad that he is gone and didn't get a chance to fight.

Rest in Peace Papa.. I love you so much and Miss you more and more everyday. </3

"

Cause when I look to the sky something tells me you're here with me,
And you make everything alright,And when I feel like I'm lost something tells me you're here with me,And I can always find my way when you are here "

"Every step I take, every move I make, 

Every single day, every time I pray, Ill be missing you ...Thinking of the day, when you went away, What a life to take, what a bond to break, Ill be missing you..."

Daytime Smokey Eye Shadow Look :)

This is a VERY popular and trendy look. With this few step process we will have you rocking a sexy, smokey look for your lunch date and even something you can wear out for drinks and dancing after work.
This is a simple look to achieve as long as you follow the steps and blend well you will achieve this beautiful smokey eye.

#1 Once you have your foundation and powder, blush/bronzer on then you can start on your eyes. (In this photo I already have foundation, powder and bronzer applied from earlier.)

#2 BROWS are what frames your eye area. This means you must keep them groomed and filled in to achieve the complete look. I am using a blonde colored Maybelline Expect Wear brow pencil. You can find these at any drug stores or anywhere you get makeup









#3 This has become my FAVORITE palette of colors for smokey eye look. Start with the lightest color on the palette. A neutral, tan base color will do.









#4 You want to apply this color all over your eyelid, up into the brow bone and in the inner and outer corners of your eyes. This will create a "clean" neutral look.







 

 

#5 This is what the base of your eyeshadow will look like. Very plain and single colored. A "clean", neutral look.

 #6 Now you are going to start the shadowing of the color. In this particular palette I am choosing the third darkest color but you can use a medium brown color.

#7 Apply the darker color into the crease of your eye. This crease is below the brow bone. If you want a more dramatic look take the dark color a little over the brow bone to create more depth. The trick with the smokey eye look is the layering of your colors... So start light and just keep adding on layers.

 #8 If you want a darker look just add a layer of darker color to your crease. I am adding some dark just for the picture sake so you can see the dimension and "smokey" look I created

#9 Next you are going to add a shimmer color which will create a highlighted look on the lighter areas of your eye. You want to apply this on the inner corner of both eyes and on the brow bone. DO NOT apply on the darker creased shadow.

 #10 After you apply the shadow the best way to add "darker" and "depth" your eyes is with eye liner. I am just using a pencil liner BUT liquid liner works amazing as well... You want to create a "winged" look to help add in with the smokey dimension of the eye shadow that you already have going on.

#11 I find that it helps if you pull the skin tight in the area in which you are applying the eye liner to create a "winged" look.

#12 Now for your lashes. I ALWAYS curl my lashes to give them that VA-VA-VOOMM lift.  Then apply mascara of your choice. My latest favorite mascara is: POWER VOLUME COLLAGEN by LOREAL. This is also when you would apply false lashes if you please to add extra length and drama to your look.

#13 The Finished look :) Hope you enjoyed this DIY smokey eye demo. Let me know if you have any questions and at all and be sure to post any pictures of YOUR smokey eyes! Thank you!!!!!

   THIS BRUSH WILL TRUTHFULLY BE YOUR BEST FRIEND WHEN IT COMES TO BLENDING THE PERFECT SMOKEY EYE. Make sure that it is a soft, long bristel brush that way it will lightly blend your colors together without removing a bulk amount of shadow that was already applied. :)

ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!